Word of the month: Triggers.
I have always had a need inside me to put others interests first. Calling upon every fiber of my being and doing my best to ensure that those around me have their needs met and can be happy. I do this even at a detriment to myself sometimes. This doesn’t always work out and sometimes I am left wondering if I am not good enough. It awakens feelings of inadequacy and embarrassment in my core. I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that, try as you might, it is simply not possible to make everyone happy. People have their own worries and problems going on and all we can do is do our best to be our best and not in detriment to our own health. It is frustrating that we don’t live in a perfect world, but it is our world. Part of any form of recovery is identifying these moments that leave us worse for ware and do our best to tackle these triggers.
Just like the small device where its purpose is to set off a firearm releasing a bullet, triggers that set off unfavorable emotions in ourselves work much in the same way. Like the trigger setting off the gun, our own triggers are a spectrum of different things; from sentient beings all the way to smells that set off our own personal bullets such as emotions, physical sensations, and thoughts. While it has been said that smell has a strong link to our memory and can remind us of pleasant times we have had, triggers in themselves are often referred to in a more negative light. Feelings such as anxiety, stress and depression can be provoked by a triggering moment or situation. They can be high risk situations that affect us such as a breakup or even a trip to a place where a bad moment happened.
Understanding our triggers is an important part of recovery. If we allow ourselves to keep walking back into situations that take us off our intended course to a better future, it can take forever to get there. We may feel compelled to keep walking into these psychological traps because they are a comfort to us, or we feel like we don’t deserve better; or maybe it’s built into our nature. Just like when I try to people please and it doesn’t work, I need to understand that to truly become a better version of myself, I need to be more selfish and allow myself the opportunities to think of my own wellbeing sometimes and avoid those triggers. Whether you have one or more trigger(s), it means that you know where you can go and the steps you can take towards becoming stronger.
Counselling allowed me a space where I could identify these mental triggers so that I didn’t end up in a repetitive cycle of self-damage. This is where counselling plays an important role towards fortifying our psyche; through the identification of what troubles us. Identifying and challenging our triggers gives us a better understanding of what we need to do to heal without being pulled back into a space that is not healthy. Because it is your right as a human to be healthy. Not only physically, but mentally.
- By Patrick
